Thundercats Movie Trailer

Fake movie trailer for Thundercats featuring Brad Pitt, Vin Diesel, Hugh Jackman

The Bailout

The Christmas Story

A Christmas Story for people having a bad day:

When four of Santa's elves got sick, the trainee elves did not produce toys as fast as the regular ones, and Santa began to feel the Pre-Christmas pressure.

Then Mrs Claus told Santa her Mother was coming to visit, which stressed Santa even more.

When he went to harness the reindeer, he found that three of them were about to give birth and two others had jumped the fence and were out, Heaven knows where.

Then when he began to load the sleigh, one of the floorboards cracked, the toy bag fell to the ground and all the toys were
scattered.

Frustrated, Santa went in the house for a cup of apple cider and a shot of rum. When he went to the cupboard, he discovered the
elves had drank all the cider and hidden the liquor. In his frustration, he accidentally dropped the cider jug, and it broke into hundreds of little
glass pieces all over the kitchen floor. He went to get the broom and found the mice had eaten all the straw off the end of the broom.

Just then the doorbell rang, an irritated Santa marched to the door, yanked it open, and there stood a little angel with a great
big Christmas tree.

The angel said very cheerfully, 'Merry Christmas, Santa. Isn't this a lovely day? I have a beautiful tree for you. Where would
you like me to stick it?'

And so began the tradition of the little angel on top of the Christmas tree.

Brown Suit

Christmastime in Washington

The Supreme Court ruled there cannot be a Nativity scene in Washington, D.C. this Christmas.

This isn't for any religious or constitutional reason, they simply have not been able to find three wise men and a virgin in the nation's capital.

There was no problem however finding enough asses to fill the stable.

Revenge

Scarecrow Moon

The Stupid Vote

Schelp to Florida - Vote Obama

Sarah Silverman wants you to visit your grandparents in Florida

Don't let a Blowjob ruin your health

Grilling

A man and his wife were working in their garden one day and the man looks over at his wife and says:

"Your butt is getting really big, I mean really big. I bet your butt is bigger than the grill."

With that, he proceeded to get a measuring tape And measured the grill and then went over to where his wife was working and measured his wife's bottom.

"Yes, I was right, your butt is 2" wider than the grill!"

The woman chose to ignore her husband.

Later that night in bed, the husband is feeling a little frisky. He makes some advances towards his wife who completely brushes him off.

"What's wrong?" he asks.

She answers, "Do you really think I'm going to fire up this big-ass grill for one little weenie ?"

Spring Break Mistake

These guys make a fatal mistake on the beach...

Spiders on Drugs

This is your Spider's brain on drugs...

Bad Case of Diarrhea

Garbage

Grandma's Boobs

Politics Explained

A little boy goes to his dad and asks, "What is politics?"

Dad says, "Well son, let me try to explain it this way: I'm the breadwinner of the family, so let's call me capitalism. Your Mom, she's the administrator of the money, so we'll call her the Government. We're here to take care of your needs, so we'll call you the people. The nanny, we'll consider her the Working Class. And your baby brother, we'll call him the Future. Now, think about that and see if that makes sense,"

So the little boy goes off to bed thinking about what dad had said. Later that night, he hears his baby brother crying, so he gets up to check on him. He finds that the baby has severely soiled his diaper. So the little boy goes to his parents' room and finds his mother sound asleep. Not wanting to wake her, he goes to the nanny's room. Finding the door locked, he peeks in the keyhole and sees his father in bed with the nanny. He gives up and goes back to bed.

The next morning, the little boy says to his father, "Dad, I think I understand the concept of politics now."

The father says, "Good son, tell me in your own words what you think politics is all about." The little boy replies, "Well, while Capitalism is screwing the Working Class, the Government is sound asleep, the People are being ignored and the Future is in deep shit."

How do you piss off a female archaeologist?

Hand her a used tampon and ask her what period it`s from.

Michael Phelps is a Jerk

You've been Barack-Rolled!